I LUVS me some RTV (pop culture ranting poem)

Blog Blog Bloggity Blog - Charlie Sheen is really a HOG - Lindsay Lohan is really a THIEF - gone are the days of Brian Keith (Family Affair). So much for this doggerel ditty - Lady Gaga, is not that pretty - but she sings better than P. Diddy - What the hell is "Hello Kitty" Who the hell is "SpongeBob SquarePants" WHO? watches "So You Think You Can Dance". Personally I prefer AI and AGT - If you don't know what the acronyms stand for - no biggie! - It just means that maybe you have a life - outside of TV - but that's not ME - that's not me! How I LUVS me some RTV (reality TV) - Unreal though it may be - How I LUVS my RTV

OK so I have no paramount issues of social importance to write about today; then again "paramount issues of social importance" are OVERRATED.

Blog Blog Bloggity Blog...

{Porcupine Blog readers, please read my previous blogs and follow my blog, A tree that falls in the forest makes no noise and a blog unread is; Well... a blog unread}

Porcupine Smith

The Bachelor Jackass

I admit it. I watch reality shows. Can't get enough of them. Even the Jackass "dating shows" like The Bachelor; though I prefer the talent competitions like American Idol or America's Got Talent. The Bachelor is a "Jackass reality show" because they feature Jackasses on the show. Like this Brad bloke. Of course his name is Brad. Biff, Buff, Bart, Bob whatever as long as it's one syllable and has a 'B' in it right? I can see why the producers selected him. He has the classic movie star looks, Greek physique and a complete oblivion to anything remotely resembling abstract thought or autonomy of thinking. He says exactly what you think he'll say at every moment and juncture of the show. What a Jackass! Of course perhaps I'm just jealous of his situation. To be featured as the only male among a bevy of beauties all competing for your attention, affection, acceptance, etc. Truth be told; as stunning as the women are on that show, they mostly have a semblance of commonness to me. All except Emily who is my favorite. She's an interesting lady. I'd marry her at the drop of a hat; not that she would marry me! On the other hand Michelle is a pathetically competitive, manipulative, insecure horror of a woman. This Jackass Brad tells each and every one of them on the individual dates, that he feels a "special" connection with them or some such hogwash and then eliminates them in order. How can anyone seriously think that you can obtain a wife in this manor. By going on a reality show. Still I wouldn't mind be in the Jackasses' shoes; for just one moment and have all the hotties competing for my attention. Fat chance of that! Maybe I should go on the Bachelorette? Lets see I'm 48, 5'8", round belly (not flat) weak hair, weak chin, bad teeth. Ya! I'm sure I'd just zoom right through to the finals on that. Anyway all jealousy and hubris aside. As far as this Brad goes. In the end he'll probably overlook Emily and choose Michelle. What a Jackass!

Porcupine Smith

Super Bowl

I have to say; the commercials and the game this year were not the most exciting. The game was actually OK (not as good as last year) but the commercials really sucked. There just wasn't one that was really funny or compelling. Eminem is old news. Justin Bieber is not news worthy; Ozzy & The Osborns were OK (I like them) The Doritos "finger sucking" add was repulsive and makes me want to consume LESS Doritos; not that I'm a big Dorito eater anyway. I didn't really get the Darth Fader "Volkswagon add" that was the big news. Personally I don't care if the kid who was in the DF suit has had some challenges (born with a congenital heart defect) so do we all to some extent! I mean I feel empathy for him but they could have put anyone in that suit and the commercial would still have been mundane! It just didn't work for me; I didn't even know it was an add for Volkswagon until I heard it recapped on the morning shows. The Pug dog was OK; just because it was a Pug but the commercial still lacked creativity. The Kim Kardashian  (sex add) was kind of "been there done that" Nothing we haven't seen in the Victoria's Secret commercials. I'm not a big Black Eyed Peas fan so the Halftime show wasn't all that great to me. The best thing about the Super Bowl was probably Christina Aguilera screwing up the National Anthem; You can't beat the reality of incompetance; especially when it comes in the package of Christina Aguilera; I like her! As far as the game; it was decent but not really a "nail biter". I'm glad the Packers won.

Porcupine Smith

New 'Porcupine Smith' Blog

I'm Porcupine Smith. I'm a poet/comedian/philosopher. I've written, published and performed many things I've written over the years including poems in the hard copy magazine 'Adventures For the Average Woman' (an Ideagems.com publication, various essays and poems 2004-09) and Zeteticon (NAU Philosophy magazine, 2 poems 2007) as well as dozen of essays and articles in Op Ed columns (various daily newspapers - AZ CA) and of course a vast multitude of Internet posts (poems, essays, articles, jokes) I also had my own radio show 'The Porcupine Smith Show (talk show) during my last year at Northern Arizona University where I graduated from in 08. I've started this blog because I want to establish a central venue for my readers and fans. I hope to soon have a regular reader base for this blog. I will try to post daily but of course I have a life "not on the Internet" so it may not always be the case; of course that will also depend on the readership I am able to garner. There's about a ZILLION blogs on the Internet these days and I can assure you mine will be different because I am different. I've always had a different perspective on things and that has never been in dispute. Please click the link to follow my blog here.

Sincerely Porcupine Smith